tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63004975437954685872024-03-13T05:37:46.235-07:00In The Heart of ChangeIt's scary growing up raised by hip hop.Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.comBlogger663125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-8253054972948948762020-10-17T12:26:00.003-07:002020-10-17T12:26:35.386-07:0025 days <div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I haven't had a cigarette in almost a month. I have to take time to remind myself I didn't feel like that would be possible more than a month ago. I was smoking in the middle of a massive fire that left the town I live in decimated with thick orange smoke. It looked like armageddon outside, the air quality was completely unhealthy to the point I stopped exercising outside and joined a gym with a basketball court in the middle of the pandemic just to be able to maintain the physical progress I had been making. With all that, I couldn't stop myself from taking down cigarettes, and unlike previously in my life, I was doing so at an alarming rate. I didn't think I would be able to stop, but here we are. I felt a lot of shame about this. I felt defeated about this. But, I was able to overcome all these feelings and follow through with a lofty goal I had for myself. I've come to realize that while the circumstances to accomplishing this goal may have changed to make things "easier" or "harder" It was ultimately on me whether I wanted to do what was necessary to fulfill this goal in my life. Such reflection comes courtesy of being able to look inwardly/outwardly simultaneously in order to maintain the progressions I've made and analyze the journey of my partner. Our settings while similar do have differences, and I am able to not entertain that or those which may be detrimental to me extending my streak and continuing with my progress. It is frustrating watching something abusive- for lack of a better word, take place that you can't directly prevent or influence. The thing I don't understand is why the people that are in your life can't be anchors and or buffers that keep you where you need to be, and forestall you from the things that are toxic. Why can't addiction be taken as serious as it should be by the people that should care enough to do just that?</div><div><br /></div><div>I am happy with my progress. I am frustrated with the lack of such by others around me. I would remove those people if that meant I could feel some form of solidarity but I'm not ready yet, and neither is she. Definitely not her. I didn't ask to be anchored down by family that isn't mine, but I guess I knowingly engaged with the outcome without seriously considering what it would mean for me. Now the only way for me to regain control or some semblance of it, is to exercise that with the people in my life. Whether that can affect others by proxy is a mystery I'd like to know the answer to, but whether or not that is the case, I know that as more time passes the decision will be made for everyone. And I've seen time heal a lot. It's said it will heal all; something I'm willing to believe because I'm living it. </div><div><br /></div><div>An aside when it comes to the battling of addictions. It wasn't something that just happened over night. There was a process that involved thinking about the change I wanted to make. There were things that I implemented to provide myself with tangible proof of progress. Things that had nothing to do with he action at hand. Exercising. Consistently meeting smaller goals. And while I have stopped doing some of those things as consistently I would hope (while undergoing a period of essentially recharging my own battery), I have maintained the focus and discipline not to continue to do the things I don't want to do. I guess I can look at it like I developed a muscle and now I'm strong enough to lift that weight without too much strain or effort. I don't think about what I'm not doing so much as I think about why people around me aren't able to follow my lead. With all that said, I know I just want to be at a certain point when I'm able to see my family again. Not just with my wellbeing concerned but financially as well. Here's to another 25 markers on that trip. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>_ _ <div> -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)</div>Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-34211021310692587212019-10-18T01:30:00.002-07:002019-10-18T01:30:26.835-07:00Clean Living on The Straight Edge<br />
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I had to let my thoughts collect before I could figure out why I was bothered so much. The argumentative behavior. The borderline abusive manipulation of random aggressive negative emotions. It became clear quickly that I had been riding shotgun (literally in most cases) to someone's own losing battle with sobriety, and I didn't like what that ultimately meant for me. I found myself being berated at an alarming rate in an even more alarming way. The things said didn't just ding my sense of overall accomplishment having just completed another hard working week at my job. They hurt my sense of well-being. The image I had felt all week dealing with coworkers, not to mention the energy transferred back and forth over the phone interacting with customers was being ceremoniously torn down. That would be something I could handle just fine in most cases, but this time it was coming from someone I was truly excited to see. Truly excited to just be around and have a good time and a few laughs with. My wife. It's no wonder that by the end of the night she would turn me standing up for myself and the sober way of living she said she wanted implemented would see her announcing herself to "feel like a single woman now". I barely registered this statement with a response other than, "okay" but it hurt man. This was normally the type of thing that would have me turn to some kind of substance to drown out that kind of pain. I spent all week fighting my brain and realizing that me not being sober wasn't good for me, nor was it good for her. and my continued path down a selfish self-medicating road needed to stop. I did this while battling withdrawals and the obligatory blanket of depression that follows after a good binge. I was done, in my head at least. No longer chasing that feeling. No longer expecting the scoring of drugs to provide some unknown adventure. I guess I grew up. So when I was picked up and in a few short minutes of confusion realized my wife was drunk (though she would never admit it. The slurring of words and wobbly driving were all-- and always are a dead giveaway) I was upset. Disappointed more like. I came to realize I didn't want to be around or associated with that version of her or anyone else for that matter because the truth of the matter is I'm extremely weak to fight against it. I kept asking myself if it was so important and if all the things she's said about me not being sober were true, then why was she sitting here after having had who knows how many drinks (the contents of the plastic to-go cup from the family restaurant were filled with a whisky coke she made for herself and snuck out of work upon leaving) asking me if I wanted to go to the bar. Long before I wanted to start being sober, I wanted to stop drinking. I realized I had only kept that habit going as a last resort of not staying in my own right mind, and as a way to partake in something that she loved or at least gravitated towards. So I guess I'm saying I feel betrayed being shown what I've known for awhile now. She didn't get high or drunk because I wanted to. She did because she couldn't control or stop herself from doing it anyway. It was my own decision to tag along or have my own desires to score some drugs that were zeroed in on and then later used as the cause of the problem to give her an easy out. And maybe that's why I had this feeling of sadness and anger in me. I don't like who she is when she drinks. She's curt. She's insensitive, and normally I'm right there with her responding with defensive fury. Tonight was different for me. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of being fought with. I'm tired of being abandoned. I'm tired of being blamed. The world won't know because I'd never purposefully try to put her in a bad light, or expose her for others to pile on with their negative opinions, but damn that sucks man. I wish I had someone to speak to. I just know I've seen the world one way for my own reasons and I lost control in front of people I thought I could trust to protect me at the very least. It hasn't been about that for awhile now, and I've just only began to smarten up. I can be such an intelligent dumb person sometimes and I'm ready to take steps to redesign the person I am fully. I have to be careful knowing how fragile everything can be. I can't ruffle any feathers or speak to earnestly because I'm not in control of anything here. I want to return home, maybe not physically but be present in a way I used to be. I have to first become someone I'm a little less ashamed of, and I won't let her gas lighting prevent me from that any longer. I owe that to myself at the very least.<br />
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This is a promise to myself. Hopefully I don't break it, but if I should sometime in the near or distant future, I'll be here to update the journey.<br />
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Yours forever,<br />
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RDH The...<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-79527330168850782612017-10-20T09:41:00.001-07:002017-10-20T09:41:07.633-07:00Plumb Dumb<br />
Basically... Here.<br />
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"... I didn't say all the things that I wanted to say, and you can't take back what you've taken away. Cause I feel you. I feel you near me..."<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-16384259608884290532017-10-20T09:17:00.000-07:002017-10-20T09:17:01.738-07:00So a friend said...<br />
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A bunch of stuff. What stood out to me the most was this, which is, absolutely terrifying when you think and consider the relationships you allow yourself to get into.<br />
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<table border="0" cellspacing="0" id="fvWord" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; border-collapse: collapse; border-spacing: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: black; font-family: Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; max-width: 100%;"><tbody style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">
<tr style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><td colspan="2" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="definedword" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; color: #1e3f7a; font-family: Arial, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 23px;">crime of passion</span><br style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;" /><div class="text" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20px; margin-bottom: 10px;">
n. a defendant's excuse for committing a crime due to sudden anger or heartbreak, in order to eliminate the element of "premeditation." This usually arises in murder or attempted murder cases, when a spouse or sweetheart finds his/her "beloved" having sexual intercourse with another and shoots or stabs one or both of the coupled pair. To make this claim the defendant must have acted immediately upon the rise of passion, without the time for contemplation or allowing for "a cooling of the blood." It is sometimes called the "Law of Texas" since juries in that state are supposedly lenient to cuckolded lovers who wreak their own vengeance. The benefit of eliminating premeditation is to lessen the provable homicide to manslaughter with no death penalty and limited prison terms. An emotionally charged jury may even acquit the impassioned defendant.</div>
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<span class="text seeAlso" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Roboto, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; font-style: italic; line-height: 20px;">See also: <a href="http://dictionary.law.com/Default.aspx?selected=1209" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; color: #333333; text-decoration: none;">manslaughter</a> <a href="http://dictionary.law.com/Default.aspx?selected=1303" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; color: #333333; text-decoration: none;">murder</a> </span><br />
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Y'all better chill.<br />
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#AntiDomesticViolence<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-37972679343218785752017-10-20T09:08:00.002-07:002017-10-20T09:08:20.103-07:00Methods<div dir="ltr">
If I could tell you everything you'd know by now. <br /></div>
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Scolded child. <br />
Go <u>vo</u><u>-la-tile</u><br />
Erase that smile <br />
Oh ya piled<br />
More bullshit <br />
Pullin sores <br />
Ripping doors<br />
Within your <br />
Sickened core's <br />
Depicted 4 </div>
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1 is more. </div>
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Truth enforced. </div>
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My accord. </div>
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Lonely; poor...</div>
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#SoMuchToSay</div>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-69358574962901081132017-10-20T02:38:00.001-07:002017-10-20T02:38:21.386-07:00Finality<br />
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<u><b>Finality:</b></u><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #979797; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px;">[fahy-</span><span class="dbox-bold" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #979797; display: inline; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px; font-weight: bold;">nal</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #979797; font-family: Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 20px;">-i-tee]</span><br />
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<section class="def-pbk ce-spot" data-collapse-expand="{"target": ".def-set", "type": "def"}" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: block;"><header class="luna-data-header" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: block;"><span class="dbox-pg" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-size: 20px;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="box-sizing: border-box;">noun</span></span></span><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">, </span><span class="dbox-pg" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #666666; font-size: 20px;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="box-sizing: border-box;">plural</span> </span></span><span class="dbox-bold" data-syllable="fi·nal·i·ties " style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline; font-weight: bold;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">finalities</span> </span></span><span class="dbox-roman" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: inline; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">for</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">2.</span></span></span></header><div class="def-set" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding-bottom: 17px;">
<span class="def-number" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: block; float: left; padding-right: 5px;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">1.</span></span></span><div class="def-content" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding-left: 37px;">
<span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">the</span> <span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="box-sizing: border-box;">state,</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">quality,</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">or</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">fact</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">of</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">being</span> </span><a class="dbox-xref dbox-roman" href="http://www.dictionary.com/browse/final" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #307dbc; display: inline; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">final</a><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">; <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">conclusiveness</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">or</span><span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="box-sizing: border-box;">decisiveness.</span></span></div>
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<span class="def-number" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: block; float: left; padding-right: 5px;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">2.</span></span></span><div class="def-content" style="box-sizing: border-box; padding-left: 37px;">
<span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">something</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">that</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">is</span> </span><a class="dbox-xref dbox-roman" href="http://www.dictionary.com/browse/final" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #307dbc; display: inline; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;">final</a><span style="box-sizing: border-box;">; <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">an</span> <span class="oneClick-link oneClick-available" style="box-sizing: border-box;">ultimate</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">act,</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">utterance,</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">belief,</span> <span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">etc.</span></span></div>
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<span style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="oneClick-link" style="box-sizing: border-box;">If it means something, let it mean everything.</span></span></div>
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-15556754776822110022017-09-23T19:41:00.001-07:002017-09-23T19:41:46.474-07:00StaringAtTheLaunchPad<a href="https://www.facebook.com/iLLerMoreStupidDOPE/posts/1550238911701025">https://www.facebook.com/iLLerMoreStupidDOPE/posts/1550238911701025</a><div><br></div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div>What a week... </div>Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-74834083753619254892017-09-23T18:06:00.001-07:002017-09-23T18:07:42.182-07:00YaMaps<p dir="ltr">"...They don't love you like I love you..." </p>
<p dir="ltr">True or not? <br></p>
<p dir="ltr">#Weight</p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-65362407173054652172017-09-23T17:22:00.001-07:002017-09-23T17:30:18.367-07:00DOUBLE L os<p dir="ltr"><u>I</u> did it. I gave in and gave you everything as a result. It felt amazing. I felt a connection. I went to sleep; woke up feeling unprotected. Wasn't a dream, but you didn't catch it...</p>
<p dir="ltr">So back to the first step.<br>
You ready? </p>
<p dir="ltr">Would you still be you to me if the curtain was pulled back? How close are you willing to get? </p>
<p dir="ltr">Here's to looking up at you, kid. <br><br></p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-86751945440240661062017-06-09T04:10:00.001-07:002017-09-13T08:50:52.355-07:00Everybody's locked Down now.<p dir="ltr">Behold what a mention can do. Thanks B.</p>
<p dir="ltr">RQ </p>
<p dir="ltr">Lean Back <br>
Whatever U like <br>
Sleep on the floor <br>
U don't have 2 call remix<br>
Why you wanna<br>
Free Will <br>
PRhyme </p>
<p dir="ltr">Plus one classic R&B joint... </p>
<p dir="ltr">*A PreSummer Night Theme*<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br></p>
<p dir="ltr">F it... #SoGoneChallenge<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br></p>
<p dir="ltr">_ _ <br>
  -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)</p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-84355313105945992512017-03-06T03:32:00.002-08:002017-09-23T18:14:03.688-07:00Post 2014<p dir="ltr"><br><br></p>
<p dir="ltr">First off, thank you for putting up with me the way you do. Patience is an anomaly in far too many attempts to integrate another's life into your own. Finding those willing to exercise it consistently with grace and understanding, deserve all the appreciation I'm able to give. I know I've been falling short, because I KNOW I've put myself first <br></p>
<p dir="ltr">But the battery in my back, will ya?<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br></p>
<p dir="ltr">_ _<br>
    -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)</p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-22533295618033087152014-05-29T11:42:00.001-07:002014-05-29T11:43:15.272-07:00ShadesOfGrae<p dir="ltr">It's going to be a struggle for me to break habits that are engrained in the strings that weave the cloth I'm made of together. I see a bit more clearly (I should look up and find a way to word that much better) that these habits are as much a product of who and what I'm around as they are my own lack of control. Nobody said bettering yourself is easy though. So far so good, although I can't help but wonder if my control is more a product of my current situation. If that were the case, should it even matter? I've seen a lot of change happening around me these last few months, no, the last year and a half. How do you react when you know you are at the epicenter of a change that's currupt? That's certainly nothing to be proud about... Unless you're some kind of maniacle villain; even then, those types usually have some moral dilemma their faced with to create a new ethos to live by. </p>
<p dir="ltr">It's sad when you see things slipping away from you; while others have had things taken, I've had the displeasure of watching things fade slowly. Now I know why the merciful end things quickly. The toll these interactions have started to take on me is probably the most necessary thing that I can pinpoint. It's hardened me some, yes, but make no mistake about new stance. I'm doing what's necessary; not what's expected of me. </p>
<p dir="ltr">An update just came across the top of my phone from an old friend. Not an update to me, just a peak into his life. I guess what he deemed important to share. I took a break from sharing because it felt like nobody cares, or they simply couldn't understand. Being misunderstood is a different kind of hurt though, and I'll have time to flesh thoughts out on that matter when the time is right. I chose to stay in THIS Heartbroken chapter because I am. Strides have been made, but I can't rightfully say the book has been closed...</p>
<p dir="ltr">There's still some moving to do.<br></p>
<p dir="ltr">Lastly, I think I may have found a new title to get lost into. Thanks Jean and Green. #Grae</p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-69599146539794913552014-05-28T19:13:00.001-07:002014-05-28T19:13:06.357-07:00I didn't press send <p dir="ltr">So I have a BIIIIIG mouth. Shout out to Pac, but seriously. I've found it easier to bury my frustrations in places people don't even know to look. Biting my tongue will be hard for sure. Especially when I hear and see people speaking so freely with no regard to how hard their words hit. Guess it's time to be the bigger mute. </p>
<p dir="ltr">I'm in the process of looking back to look forward, and what I'm finding isn't at all cute or polished. With that said, once I'm done (with this) I'm done. Those that stood taking granted for his mansion will just have to deal with that. <br>
</p>
Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-59368501472467942512013-02-05T04:25:00.001-08:002013-02-05T04:25:12.906-08:00To the Sky and Back<br />
I just found the instrumental to all my current frustrations (Thanks Dilla!). Now, anyone who has a problem with me stand over here.<br />
<br />
*points down*<br />
<br />
<br />
Cool.<br />
<br />
Anyone that has a problem with my writing stand over there.<br />
<br />
*points left*<br />
<br />
Anyone that has some unresolved business with me stand over yonder.<br />
<br />
*points right*<br />
<br />
Anyone that has love for me stay here.<br />
<br />
*holds heart*<br />
<br />
^<br />
^<br />
^<br />
With that stated, I'm now more equipped to deal with this (baby). If it's misunderstood I have to admit I kind of expect it nowadays.<br />
<br />
*Looks up*<br />
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Bernie Mac (RIP) is hilarious. *sighs* Happy got sad for a moment.<br />
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Sucks.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-88946780511629926582013-02-05T02:05:00.001-08:002013-02-05T02:05:16.745-08:00Ah<br />
So it seems I'm sowing seams just to do so, but honestly I'm curving the desire to write because I don't want the truth to come out tonight. Even as I type these sentences not really knowing where to go. It just flows...<br />
<br />
<br />
Shouts to Lupe.<br />
<br />
Matter of fact shout out to all my favorite emcees. It's been a good minute and 2012 was NOT funny as hell (anyone?). Anyway, as it grows harder for me to subject myself to music that subjects myself in the negative I drift. I'd like to stop for a second to catch 2013 with some well deserved body blows, but admittedly it's a little harder to get down with the get down, til you can't get down no more. Dig?<br />
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I'm trying to hold on with everything I have inside me, because to see this love go? Nah, it wouldn't be good.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-8492792390556942262013-02-05T01:37:00.001-08:002013-02-05T01:37:07.962-08:00Skills... Sold... Truth... Told<br />
I've grown weary over the last few years of looking at what was done. I've taken a keen interest in the path the subject takes to gain the 'what'. HOW was it done? I guess, being someone who's always been overlooked or reconsidered due to the tag attached to a name does that. In other words, skills never told the tale for me and mines. It should have, but that's not the world we live in. So HOW did we get there?<br />
<br />
I have to laugh to myself having the foresight to make yet another video game reference (they've started to build up in my writing), but it fits and is the only way I can assure I'm still smarter than need be. Not at all alarming that I could subject what I'm doing into what I'm believing or not. I just want people to stand in agreement. One arm holding themselves as it props the other ever so gracefully to be perched atop their respective chins. Nodding with trance-like focus, because what they've discovered is what I've always known.<br />
<br />
Save the punchline there. ^ ^<br />
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If I'm hit I'll gain SOMETHING! If I hit you I'll gain more of something, so what is so special about the 'something'? Everything is so contexualized, which is cool until you become the lone individual compartmentalizing each 'thing'/item in its proper form and place (context).<br />
<br />
Yeah, it's been a minute. So it's only right if I allow mandate for change. Trying to accept comfortability amidst chaos while whistling while you work. Quite honestly, there's too much work to be done to be content on the couch. Unless ******<br />
<br />
^<br />
(I couldn't find something that made me feel more clever.)<br />
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is UP on the same couch helping me out.<br />
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I lost it, bummer.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-34254415201378545292012-10-06T09:40:00.000-07:002012-10-06T09:40:57.514-07:00Clean up<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank God, I'm breathing. I'm sitting here thinking about what drugs would numb the pain best. I'm dead tired, but I can't sleep with peace of mind. I'm scarred by what I'm scared of. Scarcity is a frequent reminder of what was this time last year, and the road out of that hole has been a long one... I wish I had some kind of booster to get me thorugh today. In my my right mind, I'm barging through the door.<br />
<br />
Definitely between realities, where you see and what you understand is probably more dependent on where I see you. I hate being in a situation that I can't pull another out of. Normally is the other way around and I'm left going heads my own devices. I'm getting a little better at writing so say my peers. Very cool indeed... Beyond exhausted, but I'll wake up whenever I pass out... LIfe man.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-39449421343172554972012-09-26T23:16:00.001-07:002012-09-26T23:16:27.761-07:00This FEELS right!<br />
The things I think about when I'm writing... I mean waiting. Either way, my thoughts are quickly going to shift to how difficult this current interraction is going. I'm not sure if i like it, but then again, autocorrect hasn't been proven to increase one's receptiveness to the English language. Flatly put, I'm improving under the guise of my own reception.<br />
<br />
I wanted to be critiqued. To have enough clout to cause others to care, but that's much easier said then done. Learning that lesson is one for the monotonous and tired all at once. Leaving all mistakes because they are backed with hidden meanings to me. No dice, but I have two.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-75826602101504667382012-09-24T09:50:00.000-07:002012-09-24T09:50:01.297-07:00Professor of ?<br />
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<i style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"><b>Emeritus</b></i><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"> (</span><span class="nowrap" style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px; white-space: nowrap;"><span title="pronunciation:"><img alt="play" height="11" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/8a/Loudspeaker.svg/11px-Loudspeaker.svg.png" style="border: none; margin: 0px; vertical-align: middle;" width="11" /></span> <span class="IPA" title="Representation in the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA)"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English">/</a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="/ɨ/ 'e' in 'roses'">ɨ</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="/ˈ/ primary stress follows">ˈ</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="'m' in 'my'">m</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="/ɛr/ 'err' in 'merry'">ɛr</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="/ɨ/ 'e' in 'roses'">ɨ</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="'t' in 'tie'">t</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="/ə/ 'a' in 'about'">ə</span></a></span><span class="IPA"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English#Key" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English"><span style="border-bottom-style: dotted; border-bottom-width: 1px;" title="'s' in 'sigh'">s</span></a></span><span class="IPA" title="Representation in the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA)"><a class="mw-redirect" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:IPA_for_English" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none !important;" title="Wikipedia:IPA for English">/</a></span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">; plural </span><b style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">emeriti</b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">; abbreviation </span><b style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">emer.</b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">) is a </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-positive_adjective" style="background-color: white; background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px; text-decoration: none;" title="Post-positive adjective">post-positive adjective</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"> used to designate a retired </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Professor" style="background-color: white; background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px; text-decoration: none;" title="Professor">professor</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">, </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bishop" style="background-color: white; background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px; text-decoration: none;" title="Bishop">bishop</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">, or other professional. The female equivalent, </span><i style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"><b>emerita</b></i><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"> (</span><span class="IPA" style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;" title="Representation in the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA)">/ɨˈmɛrɨtə/</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">), is also sometimes used, but phrases such as </span><i style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;">professor emerita</i><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"> are not in proper usage according to </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin_grammar" style="background-color: white; background-image: none; color: #0b0080; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px; text-decoration: none;" title="Latin grammar">Latin grammar</a><span style="background-color: white; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 19px;"> rules.</span><br />
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<h2 style="background-color: white; background-image: none; border-bottom-color: rgb(170, 170, 170); border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-width: 1px; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 19px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 19px; margin: 0px 0px 0.6em; overflow: hidden; padding-bottom: 0.17em; padding-top: 0.5em;">
<span class="mw-headline" id="History">History</span></h2>
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In many cases the term is conferred automatically upon all persons who retire at a given rank. This is the usual case for retired<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Professor" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none;" title="Professor">professors</a>. In other cases, it is used when a person of importance in a given profession retires or hands over the position so that his former rank can still be used in his title.</div>
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In the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none;" title="United States">United States</a>, the word is used either as a postpositional adjective (e.g., "professor emeritus"), or as a preposition adjective (e.g., "emeritus professor"). There is a third usage, although not employed as often, in which the word follows a full title (e.g., professor of medicine, emeritus.)</div>
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It is also commonly used in business and non-profit organizations to denote perpetual status of the founder of an organization or individuals who moved the organization to new heights as a former key member on the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Board_of_directors" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none;" title="Board of directors">board of directors</a> (e.g., <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chairman" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none;" title="Chairman">chairman</a> emeritus; director emeritus; president of the board emeritus.)</div>
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In the United Kingdom and most other parts of the world, the term 'emeritus professor' is given only to a person who has already had full professorial status before he or she retired. Those with Ph.D.s or other higher degrees would not be entitled to call themselves an 'emeritus professor' upon retirement. The term "Professor Emeritus" is also recognised in the UK. The word is capitalized when it forms part of a title which is capitalized.. The word is capitalized when it joins another capitalized word.</div>
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<i>Emereri</i> is a compound of the prefix <i>e-</i> (a variant of <i>ex-</i>) meaning "out of" or "from" and <i>merēre</i> meaning "earn." The past participle of<i>emeritus</i> is <i>emereri</i> meaning to "earn one's discharge by service."<sup class="Template-Fact" style="line-height: 1em; white-space: nowrap;">[<i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Citation_needed" style="background-image: none; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #0b0080; text-decoration: none;" title="Wikipedia:Citation needed"><span title="This claim needs references to reliable sources from June 2012">citation needed</span></a></i>]</sup> <i>Emeritus</i> does not necessarily indicate that the person is retired from all the duties of her/his previous positions; he/she may continue to exercise some of them.</div>
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*whistles*</div>
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(1-Way Ticket)</div>
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-19220600720646915232012-09-17T12:25:00.002-07:002012-09-17T12:25:39.345-07:00Suppose a Question<br />
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^<br />
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^<br />
Here's a lesson in how my mind is a little bit different then yours. Read the title. What does it say? Now I'm sure you answered 'correctly' (let me not even get into the inside of the insider that joke resides). My answer is different. Ask me about it, or don't. Either way I just did what I I I spose to!!<br />
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(1-Way ticket)<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-84149592166373581502012-09-15T22:00:00.000-07:002012-09-15T22:00:43.015-07:00RunnerUption<br />
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Don't tell me what to do.<br />
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Why is it feelings get caught in such turmoils? Why is it even a matter of feeling? I'm sick of hearing about everyone else's feelings, because to have heard those is to ignore my own apparently. That's how it always feels presented to me anyway. The most difficult thing to impart upon another regarding the F word is that I do in fact, get it. I do understand, I do empathize...<br />
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Although at this very moment I'm not so sure, I always forget which one is which. Regardless I wonder from time to time, who's sympathizing with me? Notice I'm not looking FOR anything, just wondering in deafening silence while the soundtrack of corruption plays in the background. Hip hop taught me, TV teaches them, so why must I be misunderstood for not trusting anybody?<br />
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Anyone who matters will ultimately be cut down by my own narrow sightedness anyway.<br />
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^<br />
^<br />
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Ultimately.<br />
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(1-Way Ticket)<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-8325199874025543302012-09-15T21:15:00.000-07:002012-09-15T21:15:01.519-07:00Posted<br />
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"That's an extremely penetrating sound."<br />
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^<br />
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Silence is dumb loud... but lol at the quote anyway.<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-22033620141247047442012-09-15T20:58:00.003-07:002012-09-15T20:58:51.224-07:00St. Thomas <br />
Hi everyone!<br />
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<span class="hg" style="font-family: Baskerville;"><span class="hw" d:dhw="1" role="text" style="font-size: 24px;">doubt<span class="gp tg_hw"></span></span><span class="pr" style="color: #777777; font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> |<span class="ph t_respell" d:pr="US" style="margin-left: 0.3em; margin-right: 0.3em;">dout</span>|</span><span class="gp tg_hg"></span></span><span class="sg" style="display: block; font-family: Baskerville; margin-left: 1em; text-indent: -1em;"><span class="se1" style="display: block; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 0.2em;"><span class="posg" role="text"><span class="pos" d:ps="1" style="margin-right: 0.3em;"><span class="gp tg_pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;">noun</span></span><span class="gp tg_posg"></span></span><span class="msDict t_core" d:abs="1" id="m_en_us1241746.001" style="display: block; text-indent: -1em;"><span class="df" role="text">a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> some <span class="bold" style="font-weight: 600;">doubt </span>has been <span class="bold" style="font-weight: 600;">cast </span>upon the authenticity of this account</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"> |</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> they had doubts that they would ever win</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span></span><span class="se1" style="display: block; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 0.2em;"><span class="posg" role="text"><span class="pos" d:ps="1" style="margin-right: 0.3em;"><span class="gp tg_pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;">verb</span></span><span class="gp tg_posg"></span></span><span class="se2" style="display: block;"><span class="gp ty_label tg_se2" style="font-weight: 600;">1 </span><span class="msDict t_first" id="m_en_us1241746.002" style="display: inline; text-indent: -1em;"><span class="gg" d:priority="2" role="text"><span class="gp tg_gg">[ </span>with <span class="sy">obj.</span><span class="gp tg_gg"> ] </span><span class="gp tg_gg"></span></span><span class="df" role="text">feel uncertain about<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> I doubt my ability to do the job</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"></span></span><span class="msDict t_subsense" d:priority="2" id="m_en_us1241746.003" style="display: block; text-indent: 0em;"><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text">• </span><span class="df" role="text">question the truth or fact of (something)<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> who can doubt the value of these services?</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"> |</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="gg" d:priority="2" role="text"><span class="gp tg_gg"> [ </span>with <span class="sy">clause</span><span class="gp tg_gg"> ] </span><span class="gp tg_gg"></span></span><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="lbl">: </span>I doubt if anyone slept that night</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"></span></span><span class="msDict t_subsense" d:priority="2" id="m_en_us1241746.004" style="display: block; text-indent: 0em;"><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text">• </span><span class="df" role="text">disbelieve (a person or their word)<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> I have no reason to doubt him</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"></span></span><span class="msDict t_subsense" d:priority="2" id="m_en_us1241746.005" style="display: block; text-indent: 0em;"><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text">• </span><span class="gg" d:priority="2" role="text"><span class="gp tg_gg">[ </span>no <span class="sy">obj.</span><span class="gp tg_gg"> ] </span><span class="gp tg_gg"></span></span><span class="df" role="text">feel uncertain, esp. about one's religious beliefs<span class="gp tg_df">.</span></span></span><span class="gp tg_se2"></span></span><span class="se2" style="display: block;"><span class="gp ty_label tg_se2" style="font-weight: 600;">2 </span><span class="msDict t_first" id="m_en_us1241746.006" style="display: inline; text-indent: -1em;"><span class="gg" d:priority="2" role="text"><span class="gp tg_gg">[ </span>with <span class="sy">clause</span><span class="gp tg_gg"> ] </span><span class="gp tg_gg"></span></span><span class="lg" role="text"><span class="reg" d:priority="2" style="font-family: HelveticaNeue-Light; font-size: 13px;">archaic </span><span class="gp tg_lg"></span></span><span class="df" role="text">fear; be afraid of<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> I doubt not your contradictions</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span></span></span><span class="gp tg_sg"></span></span><span class="subEntryBlock t_phrases" d:priority="2" style="display: block; font-family: Baskerville; margin-top: 1em;"><span class="gp ty_label tg_subEntryBlock" style="font-size: 14px; font-variant: small-caps;">PHRASES</span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.016" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">beyond <span class="vg" d:priority="2"><span class="gp tg_vg">(</span><span class="v"> a </span>or <span class="v">a shadow of a </span><span class="gp tg_vg">)</span></span> doubt </span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.007"><span class="df" role="text">allowing no uncertainty<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> you've proved it beyond doubt</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"> |</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> they knew beyond a shadow of a doubt what made them happy</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span><span class="gp tg_subEntry"></span></span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.017" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">in doubt </span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.008"><span class="df" role="text">open to question<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> the outcome is no longer in doubt</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"></span></span><span class="msDict t_subsense" d:priority="2" id="m_en_us1241746.009"><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"> • </span><span class="df" role="text">feeling uncertain about something<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> by the age of 14 he was in no doubt about his career aims</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span><span class="gp tg_subEntry"></span></span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.018" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">no doubt </span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.010"><span class="df" role="text">used to indicate the speaker's firm belief that something is true even if evidence is not given or available<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> those who left were attracted, no doubt, by higher pay</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"></span></span><span class="msDict t_subsense" d:priority="2" id="m_en_us1241746.011"><span class="gp tg_msDict" role="text"> • </span><span class="df" role="text">used to introduce a concession that is subsequently dismissed as unimportant or irrelevant<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> they no doubt did what they could to help her, but their best proved insufficient</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span><span class="gp tg_subEntry"></span></span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.019" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">without <span class="vg" d:priority="2"><span class="gp tg_vg">(</span><span class="v"> a </span><span class="gp tg_vg">)</span></span> doubt </span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.012"><span class="df" role="text">indisputably<span class="gp tg_df">:</span><span class="gp tg_df"></span></span><span class="eg" role="text"><span class="ex" d:priority="2" style="font-style: italic;"> he was without doubt the very worst kind of reporter</span><span class="gp tg_eg" d:priority="2">.</span></span></span></span></span><span class="subEntryBlock t_derivatives" style="display: block; font-family: Baskerville; margin-top: 1em;"><span class="gp ty_label tg_subEntryBlock" style="font-size: 14px; font-variant: small-caps;">DERIVATIVES</span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.020" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">doubt<span class="hsb"></span>a<span class="hsb"></span>ble </span><span class="pr" style="color: #777777; font-family: 'Times New Roman';"></span><span class="posg" role="text"><span class="pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;"><span class="gp tg_pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;">adjective</span></span></span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.013"></span><span class="gp tg_subEntry">,</span><span class="gp tg_subEntry"></span></span><span class="subEntry" id="m_en_us1241746.021" style="display: block;"><span class="l" role="text" style="font-weight: 600;">doubt<span class="hsb"></span>ing<span class="hsb"></span>ly </span><span class="pr" style="color: #777777; font-family: 'Times New Roman';"></span><span class="posg" role="text"><span class="pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;"><span class="gp tg_pos" style="margin-right: 0.3em;">adverb</span></span></span><span class="msDict t_core" id="m_en_us1241746.015"></span></span></span><span class="etym" d:priority="2" role="text" style="display: block; font-family: Baskerville; margin-top: 1em;"><span class="gp ty_label tg_etym" style="font-size: 14px;">ORIGIN </span><span class="dg">Middle English</span>: from <span class="la">Old French</span><span class="ff" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;"> doute </span>(noun), <span class="ff" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;">douter </span>(verb), from<span class="la">Latin</span><span class="ff" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;"> dubitare </span><span class="trans" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;"><span class="gp tg_tr">‘</span>hesitate<span class="gp tg_tr">,</span><span class="gp tg_tr">’</span></span> from <span class="ff" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;">dubius </span><span class="trans" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: 600;"><span class="gp tg_tr">‘</span>doubtful<span class="gp tg_tr">’</span></span><span class="xrg"> (see <span class="xr" style="font-variant: small-caps; font-weight: 600;"><a href="x-dictionary:r:m_en_us1242330:com.apple.dictionary.NOAD" style="color: #2971a7; text-decoration: none;">dubious</a></span>) </span></span><br />
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^<br />
Now...<br />
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<br />
(1-Way Ticket)<br />
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_ _<br />
-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-83190311968084171352012-09-14T19:37:00.001-07:002012-09-14T19:37:33.891-07:00WhatchabeenupTO?<br />
I figured as I clicked on page 34 of multiple genre bending album reviews (via pitchfork.com) that it'd be best to figure out where I'm going with all this. To sum it up plainly, the matter of fact is I love well-written literature. Try as I may, I can't seem to find much more that pulls me in the same as flowery language being manipulated at an author's whim. Audio books are my absolute favorite, and the drought has come and gone. So reviews. An abundance of critiquing by critics who have something to say. This brings me to my next point, I've really only looked for opinions and conversation. People tend to have a plethora of reasons as to why the conversations need not go the way they are prone to going (I call them healthy debates.), but I find it easiest to file it under "not worthy" or some other more cryptic incredulous title.<br />
<br />
^<br />
^<br />
^<br />
I'm peering through lenses that have been compromised due to a lack of understanding. Critiquing those who critique what I love, in a manner I wish to develop myself someday. I tried to have others do the same for me, but I found that while I'm adept at communicating, I'd rather choose to go against the grain for sake of unpredictability. What's been predicted isn't all that groundbreaking... To me anyway.<br />
<br />
Swallowing backhanded interactions just to remain at peace is something I've grown to come accustomed to. While uncomfortable, I can't with good reason suggest a more potent means of survival to be applied in this case. Truck on playa.<br />
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I'm disappointed because I haven't kept all my goals in line. I suppose that's to be expected when approaching things as lofty as I had in mind, with such an ambitious attitude. I'm not giving up, I'm merely acknowledging the shortcomings birthed from admirable foresight. It'll get there in time, however, I'm beginning to become more aware of my mythological father looming overhead. As we all should, with time.<br />
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^<br />
^<br />
^<br />
I had to let this sit upward of 12 hours to flesh everything out. Not one bar written, and a whole slew of bars written. TONIGHT! I'M GONNA GET FUCKED UP!!! TONIGHT! I'M GONNA PARTY!!<br />
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I REALLY accentuated those statements, because I mean them lol Doooope!!!<br />
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As always it's open to everybody that claims they know me. Yet, I've had people claim I don't know them recently... I don't know if that would qualify them as strangers and thus, bad suggestions as houseguests, but I'm chilling. <br />
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^<br />
^<br />
^<br />
I'm digging all this. ;-) go Turtle.<br />
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(1-Way Ticket)<br />
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_ _<br />
-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6300497543795468587.post-78579769245504970382012-09-13T11:08:00.002-07:002012-09-13T11:08:21.280-07:00The machines slow grind until it's BOOM!<br />
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<h1 style="background-color: #161616; border: 0px; color: #999999; font-family: 'Arial Black', Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 18px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-transform: uppercase; vertical-align: baseline; width: 450px;">
<a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/2012/09/on-charles-hamilton-and-the-importance-of-brand-building.html" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #ff3366; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">ON CHARLES HAMILTON AND THE IMPORTANCE OF BRAND BUILDING</a></h1>
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posted by <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/author/jon-tanners" rel="author" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="Posts by Jon Tanners">jon tanners</a> on september 13, 2012 in <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/category/features" rel="category tag" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="View all posts in Features">features</a>, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/category/news" rel="category tag" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" title="View all posts in News">news</a></div>
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<span class="socialbutton" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: 'Arial Black', Arial, sans-serif; margin: 0px 5px 0px 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; vertical-align: top;"><span class="social_button button_googleplus" style="background-image: url(http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/themes/PigeonsAndPlanes_Complex/images/pnp-sprite-min.png?v=2); background-position: -40px -192px; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; border: 0px; display: inline-block; height: 20px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: text-top; width: 20px;"></span><span class="social_count count_googleplus" style="background-color: #252525; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border: 0px; color: #666666; display: inline-block; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; min-height: 15px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: top; width: 41px;">1</span></span> <span class="socialbutton" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: 'Arial Black', Arial, sans-serif; margin: 0px 5px 0px 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; vertical-align: top;"><span class="social_button button_facebook" style="background-image: url(http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/themes/PigeonsAndPlanes_Complex/images/pnp-sprite-min.png?v=2); background-position: 0px -192px; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; border: 0px; display: inline-block; height: 20px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: text-top; width: 20px;"></span><span class="social_count count_facebook-total" style="background-color: #252525; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border: 0px; color: #666666; display: inline-block; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; min-height: 15px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: top; width: 41px;">20</span></span> <span class="socialbutton" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; cursor: pointer; display: inline-block; font-family: 'Arial Black', Arial, sans-serif; margin: 0px 5px 0px 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; vertical-align: top;"><span class="social_button button_twitter" style="background-image: url(http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/themes/PigeonsAndPlanes_Complex/images/pnp-sprite-min.png?v=2); background-position: -20px -192px; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; border: 0px; display: inline-block; height: 20px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: text-top; width: 20px;"></span><span class="social_count count_twitter" style="background-color: #252525; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border: 0px; color: #666666; display: inline-block; font-size: 13px; margin: 0px; min-height: 15px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: top; width: 41px;">13</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/charles-hamilton.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="charles hamilton On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76079" height="430" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/charles-hamilton.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="charles-hamilton" width="600" /></a></div>
<div style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: georgia; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 20px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; vertical-align: baseline;">
<em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">By <a href="https://twitter.com/jontanners" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">Jon Tanners</a></em></div>
<div style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; font-family: georgia; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; margin-bottom: 20px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: left; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/11.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="11 On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76049" height="110" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/11.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="1" width="600" /></a>In 2008, Interscope launched <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The Hamiltonization Process</em>, a flooding of the hip-hop blogosphere in support of newly signed would-be phenom, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=charles+hamilton" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Charles Hamilton</a>. A well-coordinated crush of mixtapes supported by a variety of e-taste makers — 2Dopeboyz, the Smoking Section, Nah Right, On Smash, and a fledgling blog called Pigeons and Planes — aimed to position Hamilton at the forefront of rap’s consciousness, a fan favorite delivering content at light speed.</div>
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Hamilton emerged rough hewn, a sharp talent without a unifying vision. He was a ladies man (sometimes). He had demons (sometimes). He wore pink. He loved Sonic the Hedgehog. He challenged convention and sold himself as a kid making peace with being an outcast while rapping his ass off. While he possessed a loose constellation of engaging quirks and traits, they never cohered into a unified whole. Over the course of ten mixtapes and 200+ songs, <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The Hamiltonization Process</em> painted Charles Hamilton as an artist who didn’t just have an idea of who he was, he had <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">too many </em>ideas.</div>
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In hindsight, the concept seems a deft bridge between eras, mimicking the market flooding that accompanied <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=lil+wayne" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Lil Wayne</a>‘s rise to stardom before the release of <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The Carter 3</em>, and partially prefiguring Lil B, the social media-aided music factory that would begin assaulting the internet in the wake of <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The Hamiltonization Process</em>. The formula is simple: give the people an indigestible amount of music and, regardless of quality, they’ll be fascinated. They’ll want more. Or at very least, they’ll want to know what the hell is going on.</div>
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If much of the music is <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">good</em>, you may wind up with Wayne, or, at least, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=2+chainz" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">2 Chainz</a> or <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=gucci+mane" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Gucci Mane</a> — artists who built loyal fanbases and found commercial success on the strength of mixtape material. If much of the music is <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">bad</em> (or, to be kind, puzzling), you may at best end up an enthralling web curio (though Lil B’s catalog, intentions, and fans could fill an essay five times the length of this one). At worst, you may get swallowed up by the infinite ether of the web.</div>
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For a time, T<em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">he Hamiltonization Process</em> seemed effective: Hamilton was featured as one of XXL’s 2009 Freshmen class (alongside a trio of chart toppers, Kid CuDi, B.o.B., and Wale, as well as the similarly mercurial Blu). His name rang throughout the vast echo chamber of the Internet, and he even served up a minor hit in “Brooklyn Girls.”</div>
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<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/CHquote.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="CHquote On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76814" height="110" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/CHquote.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="CHquote" width="600" /></a></div>
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Those familiar with the hip-hop blogosphere are likely also familiar with Hamilton’s story and the precipitous downfall that followed shortly after the close of <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">The Hamiltonization Process</em>. For readers of a certain age, “rap blogs” and “Charles Hamilton” are impossible to divorce from one another, interconnected ideas speaking to a fading perception of taste-making ability and commercial influence. Hamilton’s demise was, unsurprisingly, chronicled and perhaps hastened by the selfsame blogs that anointed him the next to blow up (to paraphrase Kanye: they love you then they hate you).</div>
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The downfall itself has been well documented. As Hamilton’s tide crested throughout 2008 and 2009, the young man’s mercurial tendencies and knack for self-inflicted wounds peaked out of the surf. By summer 2009, Hamilton had <a href="http://www.complex.com/music/2009/06/charles-hamiltons-greatest-fails-a-retrospective" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">all but ruined his stock of good will and anticipation</a> with a slew of embarrassing videos (including a fabricated beef with Soulja Boy, losses in battles to Serius Jones and a random college kid, and a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmmAzVAaKPY&feature=player_embedded" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">punch from a former girlfriend</a>), dubious artistic practices, and, finally, an ugly, public spat with the mother of hip-hop’s patron saint of production, J Dilla. As his personal fortunes took a downturn, so too did his prolific and promising output, decreasing in quality and clarity as turmoil stirred.</div>
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<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/13.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="13 On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76073" height="110" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/13.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="13" width="600" /></a></div>
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In 2009, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=rick+ross" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Rick Ross</a> released <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Deeper Than Rap</em>. After facing a year of controversy surrounding his past as a corrections officer and a publicized (but ultimately limp) battle with 50 Cent, Ross curated his own surprise coronation, pronouncing invincibility across fourteen lavish tracks that poured the concrete for his subsequent reign, now in its fourth year.</div>
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In Ross’ place, some rappers may have chosen to address accusations head on, dedicating songs and whole albums to their exoneration (throughout his career Nas has perhaps been the king of this approach, most recently with the soul-bearing “Bye Baby” off of <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Life Is Good</em>; Eminem also rode this strategy to commercial success and restored reputation on his last full length album—with a title that laid the last blow on the deadest of horses: <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Recovery</em>). Ross opted for the steamroller approach, obliterating any shred of vulnerability or emotional depth for the bulletproof caricature that would culminate in Ross’ invincible statement of opulent disdain, “B.M.F.”</div>
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In just over three minutes, Ross inhabits the jackhammer temple of Lex Luger’s now ubiquitous beat, luxuriating in the pillars of his empire: contempt for competition, expensive automobiles, and cocaine-laced spoils in abundance. Though Ross unleashes far more lavish statements on <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Deeper Than Rap</em> and<em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Teflon Don</em> (the album for which “B.M.F.” served as a surprise lead single), none are as succinct and sinister as “B.M.F.” Like <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Scarface</em> without the moral coda, “B.M.F.” plays as a towering tribute to unimpeachable kingpin dreams fulfilled.</div>
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In the wake of “B.M.F.,” enemies and detractors could shout “fraud!” in Ross’s direction with the effect of rubber bullets volleyed at tank. Ross had built an unbreakable wall, founded on an outsized personality and an utter unwillingness to relent from a consistent image.</div>
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<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/15.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="15 On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76074" height="110" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/15.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="15" width="600" /></a></div>
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In crafting <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Deeper Than Rap</em> and <em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Teflon Don</em>, Ross doubled down. He ditched complexity for complete adherence to a persona—one utterly familiar to the modern rap fan, given new life with its proponent’s unflappable bravado (and outlandish imagery).</div>
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And perhaps that is the point: in an era of un-erasable histories, the best medicine is to simply soldier on. Ross addressed allegations by beefing up the bluster, building a persona so outsized it consumed the rubber bullets of reality. Rick Ross became too big for the truth to matter. Ross’ audacious self-aggrandizement may only have been possible because he had already proven himself commercially viable, but, even had his high-level prospects been hollowed by controversy, he still could have maintained die hard fans. By creating a breathing, detailed persona—a livable character and world for listeners to inhabit, if not necessarily relate to—Ross ensured himself a core fan base. That he did so while improving technically as a rapper and displaying an impeccable ear for beats should not be forgotten, but these facets fed into the aura of an immovable don.</div>
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For an artist whose work hinged so often on personal details, such a strategy might appear ill-fitting. Hamilton, however, possessed a gift for inhabiting character and illuminating elements of his life in great detail, suggesting the sort of imagination that would lend itself to a more thoughtful creation than Ross’ obese Tony Montana. This steamroller approach doesn’t preclude soul-bearing; in Hamilton’s case, perhaps it should. In his most recent music—largely ignored beyond the circles that buoyed him and continue to hope against hope that he can get his act in order—Hamilton has expressed (often cryptically) the personal turmoil that has embroiled him since Interscope days.</div>
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Unfortunately, the spectacle of Hamilton’s psychic life laid bare may be too much for the artist to overcome. A quick look at the description on his chaotic <a href="http://thelastcharleshamiltonblog.blogspot.com/" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">blog</a> suggests a young man continuing to tussle with demons in public (however dwindling a public it may be):</div>
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<em style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">“Charles Hamilton, better known as Sonic the Hedgehog, was a hero. His positive messages in his music attracted pessimistic minded, brainwashed teenagers worldwide, and though it wasn’t good for business, associates respected what he was aiming for. A bright future for the world, through music.”</em></div>
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Before the road to musical redemption can be mounted, it appears aspects of Hamilton’s personal life will need to be sorted—though great music has a way of accompanying great misery, the latter doesn’t always produce the former. Fans of untapped potential should root for Charles. Too much ill will may have clogged connections between Hamilton and his audience, and, unfortunately, some view him through a lens of mockery and extreme doubt (particularly in light of <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/2012/08/video-charles-hamilton-explains-his-j-cole-diss.html" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">recent appearances</a> that suggest, for one reason or another, Charles may be detached from daily realities).</div>
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<a href="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/CH34.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><img alt="CH34 On Charles Hamilton and the Importance of Brand Building" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-76825" height="200" src="http://cdn.pigeonsandplanes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/CH34.jpg" style="background-color: transparent; border: none; display: block; margin: 0px auto; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;" title="CH34" width="600" /></a></div>
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Myth building—and, ultimately, branding—is a clear key to generating and maintaining a passionate fan base. In the last five years a bevy of artists—<a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=odd+future" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Odd Future</a>, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=wiz+khalifa" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Wiz Khalifa</a>, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=danny+brown" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Danny Brown</a>, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=currensy" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Curren$y</a>, <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=asap+rocky" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">A$AP Rocky</a>—have rolled out music under specific aesthetics which, even when they don’t manifest themselves sonically, guide listeners, informing them on the character of the creator. Indie rock and EDM acts have understood this sort of image creation for years–look no further than lauded dance-mavens <a href="http://pigeonsandplanes.com/?x=0&y=0&s=daft+punk" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #666666; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Daft Punk</a> for a lesson in both sonic and visual definition almost unparalleled in hip-hop.</div>
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Currently, Ross stands atop the heap as a shining example of strong self-branding as the ultimate deterrent. A unified aesthetic doesn’t guarantee success; many artists with clearly aesthetics fail nonetheless. Music, of course, is a mine field. Whether you’ve figured out who you are as an artist or not, you might still fail. You might succeed; the game is cruelly random. Commitment to a firmly expressed self—whether it’s true to your actual persona or not—is as good away to increase your odds (and lay the groundwork for longevity) as any. A consistent front—plentiful music, a clear vision, and focus—could lift Charles Hamilton back into good graces, helping him achieve the musical balance only hinted at in his promising, erratic early work. In the era of the ageless internet, there’s always time for a comeback.</div>
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Interesting comparisons... I've been asking myself a lot of questions surrounding the phenomenon that is Rick Ross and his acceptance by the mainstream. I'm going to leave it there for now, but seriously...<br />
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(1-Way Ticket)<br />
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)Turtle Leehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16441963908612025857noreply@blogger.com0