Top 5 Defined by ME

Not much defining going on, but here's a list of my top 5 FAVORITE emcees right now. Peep it well, and don't laugh.

Nas, Jay-Z, Lupe Fiasco, Kanye, Eminem, Charles Hamilton, and Jean Grae.

Notice the problem?? Anyway a very extensive explanation and breakdown is in the works right now. BTW this is no particular order... I mean there's not even 5 up there! smh

Gone!

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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

SMILEZ

MARGOTCHAR

It sounds weird but Ifind attachments in those gone due to distance latch on to some new friends but they dont fit. It's old sh*t so I do what I have to just to deal with it. Not today though  hate to say so but I'm cold looking past what calms me in my very own soul. To hear it told back to me I'm backwards acting  like I'm 13 well, I do have those jeans. My favorite pair there can't you see I'm undoubtedly stuck on the path to being me. Oh well Its better than being jailed on attempt to be exempt from fails you don't get it though. The thrills the hills the ups and the free falls is all apart of what makes this all go from the start. Never claimed 'fancy' like bogard even if it go hard I'm grounded I don't ever go far. Matter of fact my car's been parked out back just like that for days. So don't laugh when I say mines is brightest thinking about their cheeks perked up and lips flipped the right way. frowns send me downward....




Dedicated to the smiles of Char, Margot, and Julia Roberts




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Ok it'd make sense if you saw what was in my book lol thanks all.


Gone!
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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

Angel's Touch

If you could imagine your very own guardian angel what would he/she/it look like? Would it be something out of a fantasy world, or resemble some1 you already know?

I think about this a lot. Moreso when I'm upset left with my thoughts playing ping pong back in forth inside my head. Yet, while I hae ideas of what my Angel may be like, she's faceless. Yes, my angel's a chick, I suppose I never will learn my lesson.

"A lot of truth is said in jest" Eminem

I always pay attention to the 'jokes' people throw at you. Malicious or not, that's just the way I've built my mind up to work. I've been tossed out of the apartment FINALLY. Can't say it wasn't deserved, can't even say it was reserved for me, just that some 'jokes' take too much of a toll for me to look past.

Hmmm who reading this wants to live with me? It'd be interesting, You have to have a love for all things that go boom and bap lol. Dead*ss though, potential roommates needed. I'd rather not have to worry about footing it alone, but then again, maybe that's EXACTLY what I need to be worrying about.

You really can't be afraid of fatigue... But I'm set in my fatigues uncomfortably blending in. I now have the wack task of finding the moment ripe enough with good feelings to surpass the ugliness of the past just to leave, and get my shorts back...

I'm sick of bullies. Sick sick sick sick sick sick sick to my f*ckin stomach. I can't decide what bothers me more though. The fact that I knowingly let these things happen, or the fact that I don't do anything about it. Sick.

Truth be told, I take as much as I do probably subconsciously out of guilt. I wasn't the nicest little boy running around, but still enough's getting to really be enough.

I have no shortage of experience when burning things up to irreplaceable status', and fear that's about where I'm getting ready to pack my bags and head off to. I'm just trying to give my Angel a face before I do. Don't want to be alone trudging through a dark swamp, and I want to know what the Angel holding my hand through it all looked like.

Fed up... Something in my left hand feels broken, Its crazy swollen right now. See Ivan? the OFF hand man lol smh

People getting too loose with their mouths time to check out.


Gone!



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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

Lost in Obsession

Reaching past the point of being annoyed right next to a meltdown preferring to take a blowup. I don't know I know I'm tempted with things that God must be placing in front of me to say 'Look your not invincible lil n*gga'.




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Trying to be honest without being nonchalant about disregarding privacy. *deep breaths* I suppose it'll all work out in the long run right? Right...?

OD'n right now. I really want to rip some1's head off with my words Slim Shady style.

'Damned if I did damned if I didn't. I lost what I had planned and envisioned. A man with many women and if any women argue, I would stand with my pretty women. All, defending me.'

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I kind of feel like that right now. I made a comment about 1 of my friend's earlier today, and that comment probably was taken the wrong way. I meant to convey a feeling of frustration with the current model for human interaction. I realize that most people would NOT have taken that from what I said.

'Late at night I'm alive. Dreaming about thoughts of yesterday. Screaming about my thoughts of yesterday. I wish I could talk to yesterday'

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There are those things which I have tucked away deep inside, that I feel are issues that deserve to be addressed. I don't know if it'll happen 'publicy' or not, most likely not, but I DO need to man up and hold a view conversations. Being without my phone has allowed me plenty of excuses as to why I'm 'falling back' again, but I only wonder what the outcome will be when I'm very accessible.

Jean Grae makes me want to write dead*ss. I'm on a terrible streak with my pen lately. At least to me, I guess no1 else would know lol. I just might try to snap if the next song's instrumental is one of those 'heart tuggers'.

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I don't really like this song.. I take that back the vibe wasn't what I was looking for... Maybe next time for you free mind.

Charles says his sh*t is done. I'm hyped, you should already know! So many questions I want answered but yo we'd be here all day lol. Stuff will be up on here as soon as I get it though. Speaking of Chuck and anticipating music. Where the f*ck is my All-City Chess Club I'm beamin remix!?



Lupe your doing it again, and its not cool my dude. Anyway I thought I'd have it like 3 weeks ago, but its looking like I'll have to exercise some MORE patience (or just listen to Recovery on repeat =) ). Funny Eminem's body of work should come up here. Much like Lupe did with his 'Enemy of The State' mixtape, Eminem's Recovery has forced me to redefine my definition of a skillful emcee.

Look back if you'd like, I went IN for Lupe after that mixtape dropped. The level of creativity and detail he used with his rhymes/metaphors on that joint were ridiculous. The level of mastery Eminem shows with his lyricism/flow is retarded. So yes, once again (my) hip hop world has been turned on its head.

My advice to any of those reading this, or remotely curious to what I'm talking about. Ignore the words I'm writing and give the music a chance. I'm just sick of the close mindedness I've been facing with music as of late lol.

Good music will prevail, I guess I look at the ups and downs of the music industry with the same slighted eye and wishful encouragement as I do with the human race.

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I really try to have faith in humanity. Silly, I know but hey, I haven't been able to shake this naive way of thinking. Now take that and re-read the 1st quote. POW!



At this point, making fun of me will only isolate me more. Misunderstanding me will only confuse the confidence I've built up in you. I've tried giving EVERY1 a piece of what they asked for. At this point, I could cry about how genuinely angry/upset I get, or I can address it my way and move on.

I just don't want to be looked at as some1 who didn't try to appease those I care about.



"Quick to sober up but no I'm going in so..."

Is that 4 CH quotes in 1 post? Lol you have to forgive me I haven't even been listening to dude much the past few days. Besides the quotes come from the top of my head anyway... Go figure.

*PAUSE*

I'm having the most random of thoughts right now check it. Larry David teaching his pops how to smoke a joint lol hilarious.

Take a second to take a second glimpse opportunities missed but raised to never quit. Acceptance is something I can't get 1 minute it is the next its getting switched, for whatever's popping at the moment. I can't condone this. Morales, and princeables are the backbone of how I choose to live. I'm strong with a message depicted like the iron fist black glove cover. king of the flings, but an intimate lover. Tucked or uncovered you have to be the 1 to let me go. Smothered with my dreams and nothing else, and on call to help when It's a woman's touch I need to feel. I could get ill, but my will isn't used toward pushing what isn't real into position to go for the steal. Besides few accept me for me, they all expect me to be like everybody... Else. My genuine generosity spreads like moss to trees in a swamp. That's how they make me feel but me, naaah why show it flash a smile tuck the disdain. Conceal the realist emotions emotionless on the surface. you said 'good day' to the pain. Try to do them a service that usually goes unnoticed, kinda hurts. Then I remembered when i tucked my feelings I also tucked my worth. So no need to feel worthless plucked a happy memory in contrast with a sad 1. Just stay grounded that's why its compounded when your down, and I don't know how to take going about shutting you out just yet. Unless I forget my courage at the door, your in store for a beauiful ending, or an ugly beginning. I'm trying to defend actions that haven't occurred and the suspense I get from the potential events got me spazzing out on the low. Blowing up, getting up, shifting to a rougher state of mind...



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Just went IN for no reason at all. Don't know what to make of that, maybe if it wasn't so 'confusing' more people might get it.



*shrugs*



Where were we? I'm lost... The Mexican is on and all I can think about are the physical appearances of Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts.. Weird I know. Its just he looks so weird in this movie, and she looks so beautiful. I mean, damn look at this chick's eyes!



About to OD on some cinnamon/sugar toast. That's my ish right there! Super hungry still for those that saw the tweets. Time to wrap it up I can't focus anymore I'm 5000.



Gone!



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 -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

Parks and Apartments

Still going through what should be labeled the preverbial self loathing cycle of the day. Not because I loathe much of self, other than my inability to stay away from such uneventful celebrations. 

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I guess there's no need to explain my mood entirely now. 

It's nice out, and the food did hit the spot but is it bad to feel like it's time to wrap it up? I suppose the worst part in all of this is I will not budge anytime soon. 

Meroki what's good? We haven't talked since you said we weren't going to be able to talk due to bad reception, distance, etc. So how are you really? For once this is my only real means of 'intimate' communication. 

For the time being anyway... I can't decide whether I like not having a phone or not. I guess it's best to say it has it's pros and cons. 

Hip hop is killing right now! Individuals deserve their own posts but shout out to the 1's putting in that major work right now. I've been listening to the following artists:

Eminem (recovey is crazy it's hard to listen to anything else right now.), 

Drake (the backlash he's getting for thank me later isn't at all warranted. However, good points are being made. Soft or not I like the album.)

Fahawn (just dropped his much anticipated mixtape 'ode to illmatic'. I haven't listened all the way through, but he was going in. I didn't know he could rap like that. Dead*ss.)

Jean Grae (uhhh need I really say anything. She's just nice yo.)

Royce da 5'9" ( bar exam 3 is bananas! I hate skinny jeans track is hilarious)

Charles Hamilton ( there's a new Hamilton project dropping any week now. Hyped.)

Jonelle monae (different. Haven't heard RnB this refreshing in awhile. If you can even call it that. She's dope though)

I think that's all.. I've been trying to open an ear to Rick Ross, but no real luck there lol. I can't wait to here big boi's album though. 

That'll bring inspirational nights wrapped in funkafied backdrops and something mean to make me cough. Ehhh... 

Winding down. Feels that way, yet looking at the time I know this can't be true. I want to make a trip to the car my buds are in there along with my tiny computer friend with ALL my music. 

Decisions to make... And apartment shopping. I'm not feeling not feeling Sacramento, hopefully I can change all of thAt with the current path I'm entertaining. 

These little n*ggas is mad cool. Bad. But. Ultimately mad cool. Their plotting how to touch more cash for the summer, can't say I'm condoning jut appreciating tj fearlessness of ignorant youth.

I once shared their jaded perspectives so believe me no judgment going on here. More like slanted observations.

I need a haircut, or to continue avoiding that which I know I need. Either choice is fine if I'm willing to stick with it. My face is a monster on some Wolverine sh*t though. No worries there.

I thought I just saw Kiddy, gotta smile at that. Which only reminds me of Char turning that smile into A big corny boyish cheese. *sighs*

Meghan's views are wack and I don't mind stAting so. Just because things are different doesn't make them wrong. People have to learn to start letting go of these fabicated (by who?) truths. 

All those happy thoughts are either going to turn into something negative or positive standing depending on how the rest of this basketball conversation I'm eavesdropping on Goes. Smh lakers are ok, I really wanted that last game though. 

It's a plus for the NBA to have both teams playing so well. I just wig the refs would stop with the suspicious calls. It's getting a little out of hand. 

I'm feeling like these looks are telling me the phone needs to be out of my hands. If that happens however, I b-line it to the car for prior mentioned audio devices. 

Don't know where my friends have been and that's moreso my doing than it is their prowess at subterfuge. Is that even right?

Ahh the convo I'm eavesdropping on has switched locations, groups, and topics. 

Hip hop hello. Lol

Damn it just hit me these kids are going to see some parental guidance in the near future. Wonde how all that's gonna play out...

Dj khaled, timberland, swizz beats as rapper... Snooze. I won't subject my ears to anymore of this ignorant banter. 

To the car !

Gone! 




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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

And So I Blog..

Feel like talking but the convo got shut down. Relapse and Recovery were the subjects. Eminem is the best rapper alive.

Period.

Relapse was super dark in its sound and moreso its content, but maintained to be a lyrical beast. I for one love the album. Em's crazy stories don't bother me one bit because he creates them with such lyrical mastery that its hard for me to NOT appreciate how artistically gifted the man is. I'm not even going in..


I do however challenge any1 to listen to 'same song and dance' with your eyes closed and not see exactly what Eminem is depicting in that song. Dead*ss go do it. Here I'll help...



 


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Equipped with lyrics for you folks that can't follow directions.

Recovery may be the most lyrical album I've ever heard. I'm not trying to gas it either. I don't know how I feel about the album in terms of ranking it or whatever just yet, but its damn good.

That Marshall smh... I'm going to do some shuffling in my top's and favorite's lists soon most likely. Going to be changing the blog up too in the very near future. I love what great music inspires lol.

I've still yet to hear Big Boi's Andre 3000-less album. Summer's bout to heat up!

Recovery Review? My 'lists' breakdown? I'm considering both.
Gone!

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 -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

Half-Baked Confessions

So I was literally toasted last night. Had a nice post about it all too. See I was at a party and my berry broke so I grabbed Jess' Iphone and started going IN. Yooo I was not playing lol. The party was wack, I don't really even like parties like that, but shout out to the birthday girl!

Anyway, I was basically secluded in my little corner downing that good ol' 'firewater' already a little out of it prior to even arriving at the party so yeah, I was definitely 'osted' lol.

The highlight of the party had to be the ill convo I had with the bday girl's bf  and some other guy. Spoke on Eminem, Kanye, Wayne, T.I., B.o.B, Asher Roth, I know there were more but it was cool. They aint really have points that I agreed with but hey, hip hop ftw.

Lakers are struggling in the 4th right now. ugggh I don't feel like dealing with the emotional anvil that comes with an LA loss, so hopefully they pick it up. I have some CRAZY posts planned that were done and well on the way to being posted. However, due to the nature of the posts (they are personal for me) I decided to hold off and expand on a few of them.

I don't want to be the 'bs-rrr' but all I can say right now is the important ones contain cartoon characters. Yeah...

The other WAS entitled 'friends' but was on the now broken blackberry of mine. Bummer... I had a lot to say in that 1, and it actually was the spark that got me going on the 'personal blog post' kick.  I'm not tripping, just another day to expose some fake friends.

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Definitely made that sound like I was just going to be bashing those who've wronged me (in my eyes anyway), and that's not the case. Just have a lot I want to get off my chest. By that I mean not write to myself in my notebook/phone. So for those that send me txt msgs with the 1 word answers/replies (I don't like those at all btw makes me want to throw my phone like a knife to the space between your 2 eyes) you have no excuse for not having something to talk about.


LA lost series is tied at 2-2. I sheepishly predicted last night while on my drunken binge that LA was taking it in 5 lol. I know its that was a longshot to begin with but I was trying to be daring.. *sighs*

Bring on the anvil lifters.

And they better bring steroids.


*Half-baked*

dig it.



Gone!

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 -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)