Now it's this, blame.. Yup, I do.

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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

All my BEezy's

Yeah your right he's so disrespectful you don't deserve that he's a jerk he's a fool and an asshole. Not worth the hassle he puts you through the mental and physical abuse all the trouble when all he does is break you down to rubble. Kick you like rocks hardly tell you he loves you definitely doesn't show it. Ain't been working for how long? Still claiming that he's focused. Thinks he gets a pass for bein a half ass 4th rate poet. Come on girl you and I know it, and this is YOUR chance now, don't do something to blow it. We can go out get some drinks get loaded. I know you hate being grounded tree's on me I'll keep you floating. Call a couple guys; Asians won't do right? Right I gotcha I'm your beezy say it with me 'IT'S GONNA BE A GOOD NIGHT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT' aight coo coo hella crackin I'll keep you away from mics chopped samples and crazy book bags, and anything else that might make you want to slap him. Or even ask him a question it's best to just get your mind off it. Don't look said I told you we off it. Me and you, you and I this the life. I gotta go live mines so I need to make sure you see the light (before I'm gone). How about a change of scenery? It could be nice... I know that look though look hoe being cold as ice ain't the way. You think he's tripping you think he even cares? My god you gotta understand you were living out nightmares. Taking everything you hated along with all your manifested fears. That left you alone and angry at night texting me in tears! I hate to see you here! So take my hand I'll be your baby today. No problems you not we not REALLY gay. Might think a women or two could get it but never questioned who's who. As in me being me, and you being you. I'm type rude you deal that's why we're still cool. Take me for example, yeah I made some mistakes. Every time I did you were there in haste taking your proper place. The grand reprimand always came with offset with some fairly good truths. So I no when you reprove it's cause you want me to do the right thing. Oh M GEE, he's... kinda on my fb, my tumblr too always liking things I say or events I do. I can kill it boo off him, it's nothing to me. Whatever's gonna bring you happiness will be. Y for... You know... no more Uno for you. you need me pick up the phone whatever I can do to reduce the stress of what your going through. True friend sh1t here's to our friendship let's toast up and pray we don't come across you know who getting to pensive. F*ck he's so damn offensive. Most boys are men are too but he's a far cry from a man. Pitifully broken obviously needs a hand to guide him through the mud cause he sinks where ever he stands... Here's the plan we're gonna pinky promise that we'll always be honest and do our best to understand 1 another. your like my brother, I mean sister both in a way though. Basically family that's a whole lot to say so cherish it cherish me I absolutely believe in you. Your family does too... Your dad loves you. The fats been trimmed there's nothing above you. Life didn't end it's starting. This From the heart I LOVE YOU... You crazy beezy.








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-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

20/20 cause I'm 730

In hindsight nothing seems right, and I suppose that's the way it's going to feel for awhile. I let things out to reach a plateau I was desiring from myself, and admittedly it was wrong and disrespectful. I stand by what I said because I know the image that's upheld in my head, but others can't see that. I didn't take a minute to think about that when I definitely should have.

I'm honestly somewhat relieved because I feel like 'me' is finally out the bag. The more people know how irresponsibly corrupted I am the better. Things have gotten awkward, and it's probably best to just fade to black on some other sh1t. I can't control the situation anymore, and busting past breaking points is something I've become adept at. Only this 1 isn't really bending it's snapped in half.

Jess I'm sorry.

Nothing really left to say to you.

Kiki I'm sorry.

Nothing really left there either.

I just would like those people to understand my lashing out came from a place of betrayal and pain. I was hurt by you, and instead of communicating that like a normal responsible adult, I hid it inside of me for too long until...

So yeah I was wrong, I was definitely in the wrong. I'll work on me, you work on you and maybe someday it'll be cool like we used to be. Don't party too hard, you got some crazy friends.

I truthfully won't be able to go back, this time will probably find myself exploring things I've always been too timid to look into previously. I'm still going to be scared as hell, but I find solace in my solidarity. I don't like it, but peace of mind is peace of mind.

If you ever miss me, like I miss you now go to youtube (or here)and play this...






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Jess is rolling her eyes or wiping away tears with a smile *muah*... Every1 else didn't listen. It's all love, just sometimes we hurt those we love the most. Off it to the office.







*Whenever you need me... I'll be arouuuuuund*



_ _
-/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

DO I MAKE SENSE YET!?

Or am I just... Senseless?