Now it's this, blame.. Yup, I do.

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Monday, June 14, 2010

Troubling Thoughts

If you really love and care about people refrain from putting these into 1's head. Never does this result in positive results, at least not in my experiences. Neither here nor there however..

So many different sounds infiltrating my ears and I'm loving it! It's about the only thing keeping me from flipping out right now. That and Marley's pretty face =) I've already planned to lay my head wherever she designates tonight. Me and my b*tch.

I'm not feeling the double standards on words more than ever right now, Like its truthfully pissing me off a little bit. Recent arguments have made me think about things like this lol. Think about it though, when your upset, AND engaged in a verbal shootout aren't you trying to hit the other person? Maybe its just me, but I'm not going to get shot at and then shoot to mis by 5 feet. Just doesn't make sense.

With that said, what's the one word that women find offensive pretty much across the board? Taking that away is like saying I'm not allowed to snipe you when I clearly had the chance 5 min. ago on some 'Why don't you shoot him already! frustrating cliche movie sh*t' Its silly.

Anyway the frustration is felt in all categories from me rigt now. Freedom of Speech ftw =)

That's 2 smiley things in 1 post, I'm trIipn.That reminds me of Squishy, Meroki, Freakbody, Rora, Kansas and everything in it. Loving my memory right now.

More to say, but it can wait. I'm good now.





Gone!















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 -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

days turn to nights back into days...

I'm just really going off the deep end here. Part of me believes the inevitable move is not sitting well with where I'm supposed to be in the grand scheme of things. Distance. Tried that, no thank you. My heart's heavy and my mind's heavy.

Typing this I can feel my eyes slowly swell. I'm trying to decide whether to let the tears fall or to hold them back. I don't even know what the purpose of crying would be at this point, but cry away I just might. Jess is here but she doesn't know how to love me right. There I said it.

I try not to lose myself in fantasies of what 'may' be but I live in a fantasy world so it gets extra tough. My allergies are getting to me. Them on top of the heat already filling my head up are not a good mix. I'm dead*ss sweating shirtless with the fan blowing on me full blast.

I did A LOT of reaching out today, and I don't know if I was successful in what I was trying to do. The point is I reached. Tomorrow really needs to be about SOMETHING. I don't care too much the significance of what that 'something' is, but progress is the lane it needs to be in.

I don't know if writing to myself right now is helping or not I just know when I get to typing I can let my mind go a little bit. Listening to my itunes on shuffle. Its kinda ill, but I guess that's because it's mostly Eminem and Charles Hamilton at the moment. I'm having an issue getting that list together and that's definitely not a bad thing.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

Felt obligated to sift through my itunes for more 'variety' since I have guests over. I really don't like when that happens, I have to try to gauge how they feel about the sh*t I love. I could care less if they don't love it or even like it cause its mine, but now its easier to see why I wouldn' like being put in that role.

The night came and went, not much to say really the morning has been interesting and we haven't broken past 730 yet. No sex in Jess' room. Period, don't know how I feel about that. Let me be more blunt since privacy is less and less of a concern I'm good without 'a woman's touch' because I can ALWAYS have the melody.


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Even if it's a stranger to me.

As of right now I'm focused on reworking my itunes once again. I'm taking it back, so every artist I used to f*ck witth at 1 point is getting love. Cam, Juelz, and Dipset are the primary artists at the moment. Thanks for datpiff lol.

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Ok it's well into the day now... See how entries just sort of expand? Lol I took it a step further almost completed Charles' catalogue minus the exclusive cuts. 1 more to go for Eminem. Cam Juelz and Dipset I'm done with though, collected some old Drake and Wale, moving on to Jean Grae. I can honestly say I'm having the time of my life.

I'm actually quite the house cleaner when I'm focused... Which I'm not right now, so let me get back to that. Margot I see you something just for you soon!




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IF this post had a purpose or point I have since lost it.








Gone!

_ _
 -/Rebel2Society\-v(**)

DO I MAKE SENSE YET!?

Or am I just... Senseless?